How to deal with a golfer who cheats – part three


“If there is any larceny in a man, golf will bring it out.”Paul Gallico

By Ian Hardie

In the post How to deal with a golfer who cheats I discussed what I think

Is the best way to deal with a golfer who cheats on their scores by telling you

That they had a lower score on a hole than they really did

I followed that up with How to deal with a golfer who cheats – part two in which

I took a look at how to deal with a golfer who cheats by using their ‘foot wedge’

To improve the lie or position of their ball if it isn’t too good

By moving it with their foot when they are in the rough or the trees

The sort of golfer who even though they may hit the golf ball all over the course

Never ends up with a bad lie or being blocked out by a tree for their next shot

It’s now time to take a look at how to deal with a golfer who cheats in a different way

But one that results in a similarly consistent ‘stroke of luck’ every time these golfers

Play a shot that you may expect would result in a lost ball for them

You know the one I mean – a shot that would be a lost ball for you or me

But these ‘lucky golfers’ just happen to stack things in their favour

By having a spare ball or two in their pocket while playing

Ready to be covertly dropped using distraction and sleight of hand

And their ball just happens to be ‘luckily found’ shortly afterwards

Much like the other two types of cheating golfers – a lot of people suspect these golfers

But find it quite difficult to catch them in the act of dropping the spare golf ball

A few years back however, I witnessed just such an occasion

Where a golfer was caught out dropping a spare ball in the trees

Due to something that happens quite often before a game of golf

Being taken one small step further by the golfer that caught the cheat

The simple act of enquiring on the first tee as to what golf ball everyone is using

To avoid the situation where two golfers in the group are using the same golf ball

With the same numbers or markings on them both is something

That a lot of golfers do automatically every game they play

Which is a good idea as I wrote about in the post

Why you need to put an identifying mark on your golf ball

What made the difference on this particular occasion though was that

One of the other golfers in the group had played many rounds with the golfer

That was suspected to be cheating by dropping balls every time they got in trouble

I later found out that the suspected golfer had ‘never lost a golf ball’

During the 30+ rounds of golf that they had played together that year

The golfer that suspected them though, had been trying to figure out a way to catch them out

As they were absolutely certain that something wasn’t right with the other golfers ‘luck’

The day I happened to play with them both was going to be different though

As the golfer was armed with a new plan to catch the suspected cheat

Following the introductions and card swapping on the first tee

The golfer enquired as to what type of golf ball, its number and markings we were all using

I thought nothing more of this and to be honest hadn’t even noticed

That as we answered the golfer calmly wrote down

Each of our names, type of golf ball, its number and markings

On a little blank space on the back of the scorecard that they had that day

As the round progressed I noticed that the golfer seemed to take a special interest

In just exactly where the shots of the suspected cheat were finishing

Having earlier been told that they had played together frequently I thought that maybe

They were just good mates or possibly they had a friendly wager on the side going

On the 15th hole though, I realised just why all these things had been happening

The suspected cheat had hit what could only be described as ‘a terrible slice’

Away to the right of the fairway in a stand of trees

As they were first to tee off on the hole and the ball was clearly in the trees somewhere

I thought nothing of the fact that as soon as the rest of us had teed off

The suspected cheat headed towards the stand of trees at a fairly fast pace

Just as the rest of us got to the point where the suspected cheat’s ball would have been

An extremely clear ‘I’ve got it’ emanated from within the trees

Undeterred the golfer headed into the trees to see the ‘found golf ball’

‘Found it have you?’

‘Yes, luckily it’s sitting up nicely over here’ replied the cheat

The golfer continued to head into the trees and took a look at the ‘found golf ball’

‘So this is your golf ball – an ‘x’ brand, with the number 3 and a dot on it?’

‘Yes, that’s the one alright – been using it all day’

‘Really?’ said the golfer while looking at the back of his scorecard

‘If that’s the case, what happened to the ‘y’ brand, with the number 2 and a dot on it that you started the game with?’

How’s that for a simple and effective way to catch a cheat?

Play well


Related Posts

How to deal with a golfer who cheats

How to deal with a golfer who cheats – part two

How to deal with a slow golfer

How to deal with an annoying golfer